The Bad Form Freakshow
by Winter's Writing
Summary: A memorable bloodbath victim reviews the good forms, the bad forms, and the just plain stupid ones. Constructive criticism only (I think).
1. Hello Panem!

"Hello Panem!", announced a blonde-haired girl, "Welcome to the Bad Form Freakshow! My name is Nelly Solace, and after I rose from the dead, I decided to do something for the good of tributes everywhere."

"Like what?", asked an audience member.

"I will be reviewing tribute forms, and judging whether they are good, mediocre, or bad. I will be asking you, the audience, to submit YOUR forms for SYOT tributes you've submitted, and I, along with a few guest hosts, will analyse it!"

"But what if they take offence to your judgement?", asked another audience member.

"Well, if they submit, I will give constructive criticism, and hopefully everyone else, along with my creator, will be able to learn from me to make their tribute forms so much better!"

"But what about those guest-submitted forms that are just so Sue-ish it hurts?", asked yet another audience member.

"I WILL be reviewing those, but obviously I can't ask the guests," replied Nelly, "So I will just put them in, and they will get constructive criticism as well, no matter how harsh it may be."

"But Nelly, I thought you were a cheerful poet who loved cheese and sunshine! Is it even possible for you to be harsh?"

"That's why I'm getting guest hosts."

The questions and answers went on for quite a while, and then Nelly waved goodbye to the audience, and stepped off the stage, happy with how she performed.

 **Hi, Winter here. I know there are these stories out there that review bad SYOT tributes and cliche stuff about them, and I've always found the part where they compare a good tribute to a bad tribute hilarious. Enter The Bad Form Freakshow, hosted by none other than Nelly, who, for your information, is not a zombie. But she is technically dead. I think that intro there covered everything, and if YOU want to submit a form for Nelly to review, PM me!**


	2. TBFF Episode One: Lark and Emerald

Nelly strode out onto the stage for another episode of The Bad Form Freakshow. _Really, it could have been called something else_ , she thought, _a bunch of the forms are actually good._

The audience cheered, as music played and Nelly smiled. She introduced the show, yet again, and the logo was displayed on the large screen behind her.

"Today, our special guest host is... my brother Kyle!", Nelly announced,while her brother walked onto the stage next to Nelly, while crowds were cheering his name.

"It's great to be here, Nelly!", he said, "I have the first form we'll be looking at today, from a guest. It was submitted to a CLOSED SYOT!"

"Wow, that's weird," replied Nelly, "Anyway, who's the tribute in question?"

"Never mind, I'll just read out the form," said Kyle, "Here it is:

My tribute is called Lark Rise and she is has blonde wavy hair,olive skin ,Blue eyes and older sister was killed by district 2 last year and she wants secretly loves her district partner whoever he will be (District 6)

She is a girl who is not afraid to say what she weapon is a throwing knife and I'm hoping she gets a score of around 9 or can climb really tall trees.  
PLEASE USE LARK IN YOUR FANFIC"

"That doesn't make sense," says Nelly, "Do you want me to spell-check it? I'll have to guess some of the missing words, though."

"That'll be great, thanks!", replied Kyle.

"Okay, here we are:

My tribute is called Lark Rise.

She has blonde, wavy hair, olive skin, and blue eyes.

Her older sister was killed by District 2 last year and she wants to avenge her.

She secretly loves her district partner, whoever he will be.

She is in District 6.

She is a girl who is not afraid to say what she wants.

Her weapon is a throwing knife and I'm hoping she gets a score of around 9, or can climb really tall trees.

Please use Lark in your fanfic!"

"But there's still so many things wrong!", commented Kyle, "There are too many cliches for me to count!"

"Kyle, remember, constructive criticism. Anyway, yes, there are a lot of errors, and I will address them all now, in a list:

The first error was that absolutely no age was present. Lark could be twelve, or eighteen!

There's no personality whatsoever. We have that "isn't afraid to say what she wants" part but that barely helps the author.

There are so many grammatical errors that one can barely understand the form.

Her family and backstory are not mentioned, except for the "sister dying in the Games" part.

It's highly improbable that a girl with that appearance would be in District 6. If it was Four, or Seven, or even Twelve, then it would be fine, but not in this district.

This form just lacks substance overall.

The whole "loving district partner" thing is very cliche.

As are the "avenging sister" and "Career-level high training score" things."

"Nice work Nelly," says Kyle, "but can I say how the submitter could improve those things?"

"Sure, I've had a lot of screen time already."

"Thanks! Here's another list, because lists are awesome!

Please actually fill in important details.

Can you please add a bit more personality, so that it's easier for the author to write, and the character is liked more by the readers?

Please use grammar-check or spell-check, it might be annoying when it tries to autocorrect names, but it shouldn't be a problem with a name like Lark Rise, and authors are more likely to accept forms with good grammar.

An interesting backstory would be nice too.

Can you please adjust either the appearance or the district, or at least give a reason why she has such an odd appearance for Six? Chill, if your character's not blonde-haired and blue-eyed, we won't automatically hate her. Other natural hair or eye colours are okay.

It would be more beneficial to your character if she wasn't such a Sue.

It happened ONE TIME people! Romance is fine outside the Games, but please not in it. My CREATOR is guilty of this one, so we're all hypocrites.

Okay, never mind, it's fine, but not too much, okay?

Maybe include why exactly the character got that score, to provide proof that she is deserving of a 9. Or, you can just give her a lower training score."

"Great work, Kyle!", said Nelly excitedly, "I guess everyone knows the verdict for that form! Bad, but every bad form can be improved! Would you like to tell us what's wrong with this next form?"

"Yeah...about that..."

"What happened?"

"Well," Kyle said, "this form is really good! Some of you guys in the audience might recognise her!"

"Show us then!", replied Nelly.

"Okay," said Kyle confidently, "I'll talk about it as we go along, then it'll be easier. Here goes..

Name: Emerald Thunders **Interesting name.**

Age: 17 **I'm not going to be too nitpicky about age, there's only a few ages tributes can be.**

District: 1, 2, 4 **I guess that explains the name then.**

Personality: Emerald is… different. Many think she's not well mentally. Many think that she's a psychopath whereas the truth is far from both. Emerald is very sharp and thinks things through before doing anything. The reason people wonder if she's alright in her head is her contagious, and continuous laughter. **This is already sounding like a fun tribute to read about.**

It's almost as if she breathes in laughing gas every other minute. Emerald's laugh is maniacal because she likes it that way. It's funny, because she likes it that way too. And it's dangerous, which too is intended. Emerald doesn't play the typical dumb girl from One, she's not dumb so why should she pretend? If she comes to it, she can destroy anyone in an argument but she doesn't like arguing, because it interferes with laughing. Her obsession with laughing kind of borders on insanity. **There's so much I like about her, and we're not even done yet!**

Other than her laugh, Emerald is quite normal. She's not a heartless *bleep* and has absolutely no interest in the Games (I strongly believe that people would not want to volunteer during the 25th games, except a few mad fellows that is). She is interested in making and studying maps. In fact, her obsession with maps almost competes with that of laughing. **That's a pretty unique hobby, which is always good.**

Emerald is always lost in a world of fantasy, but if need arises she'll wake up and take charge. She likes to think that there is a secret passage everywhere, that people around her might be detectives. She loves reading spy novels, and likes to believe she's a detective too. She has a knack of solving puzzles and to find solutions that are not easy to find. **Awesome!**

Emerald will be nice if you're nice to her, and if you're not… she'll still nice to you, because she doesn't pay attention to 80% of the things people say. Humans, she thinks, are fools and nothing they say matters. She thinks so because she's sort of absent-minded, and refuses to believe she's absent-minded. **Cool!**

She often tries to terrify people around her, but only for a laugh and often mutters an apology later which doesn't sound like an apology. Emerald is NEVER serious, even when she feels like crying, she breaks into a laugh and makes jokes about what is bothering her. But, by no means, is she a joker. She doesn't understand sarcasm or too much of emotions unless it's in extreme. Quite insensitive. And sometimes quite careless too. **That makes sense.**

Reason they were voted in: because people thought she is dangerous, with her very weird behaviour and very intelligent brain. And her maniacal, villainous laugh. **I understand completely. If there was someone like that in my district, I'd vote her out too. Unless there was some sort of criminal. But I still like her!**

Backstory: Emerald has had nothing special during her entire life. When she spoke her first word, at the age of two, which was quite late, it was 'kangroo'. The next was 'idit' and she loved calling her parents those. When she was slightly older, she fell ill. Having enough money to afford a doctor, her parents called one, and his medicines worked like magic. He also saw that as a six-year-old, Emerald didn't laugh much. So in a joking manner he told her 'Laughter is the best medicine. Hahahaha!' **Nice. I can see where this is heading.**

Little Emerald took that VERY seriously. Initially she forced herself to laugh at what wasn't even funny and it took her two years to appreciate humour. However, she got addicted to laughing, you see? And finding humour in EVERYTHING. Even when the neighbour's cat died. Or when her best friend lost in the dance competition. It was all funny. Too funny for her. Part of the reason she laughed at everything because she had started and didn't know how to stop. Once she fell off the roof of her house, and broke her ankle but instead of crying she laughed and called her parents. **Wow. Now I can understand why the voted her in. Or out. I don't know.**

She saw the therapist, Killian Gemini, till she was fourteen, but the therapist himself went a little insane. He too started laughing for no reason and the two became friends and her therapy sessions turned to quality friendship time they spent, trying to make a joke of whatever happened in their daily life. Ultimately the therapist was sent on his way. They are still friends. **I can see this becoming a horror story, the girl who infected everyone with insane laughter. But Emerald's nicer than that. I think.**

Faceclaim: Bruna Linzmeyer **Cool.**

Strengths: Intelligent, Carefree, Friendly, Scary **No problems with this.**

Weaknesses: Absent-minded, Insensitive, Uncaring, Weird **See above verdict.**

Song that describes them: It's a Small World **PERFECT.**

Reaped or Volunteered?: Reaped **Makes sense.**

Why/Reaction?: she clapped her hands and laughed, doubling over due to laughter, and pointed at the escort and laughed again. She was so scared that she couldn't even move and found her situation to be so bizarre that she laughed hysterically. **Well that's a reaping scene I haven't seen before.** "

"What about Mindy?", interrupted Nelly, "You know, the one who killed me!"

"She was different," said Kyle. "This was the 25th Hunger Games for goodness sake! Wait, I just realised something, we're in the future! Our story was in the 23rd Hunger Games and.."

"Let's save the groundbreaking realisations for later, Kyle," said Nelly, "we have a form to finish."

"Okay, fine:

Why should they win?: Because she isn't bad, cruel and yet not saint. She was sent only because the people thought she's bad, but she isn't bad, but she won't hesitate in doing her best to get out. Plus, I think she's different for a career girl and I honestly feel that a sane but insane person should win. **Good reason!"**

"Oh, that's it?", said Nelly, "Final verdict, Kyle?"

"That was an insanely awesome form," I said, "The bar is surely set very high for the next forms to come in! We'll see you next time, Panem, on The Bad Form Freakshow!"

"I think we should change the name though," whispered Nelly, "You saw Emerald's form!"

"Too late now," Kyle said as they walked off stage.

 **Well, there you have it, the first chapter! I bet a lot of you** **already know who Emerald's creator is, but in case you don't, she was submitted by Reader Castellan. I hope you enjoyed this first chapter!**


End file.
